I won't dilly-dally around with talk about the Super Bowl, Beyonce, that hilarious Doritos commercial with the goat, or the Budweiser commercial that made me cry. Let's just get straight to bizz.
As a lot of you may know, I like to think that I'm an independent woman. I pride myself on it and it doesn't take someone long to see that. I'm not super needy, I like doing things on my own, I go to concerts by myself, and I will NEVER ask a man to help me assemble a desk or hang something up on the wall. It's just not me. I have an "I've got this" mentality. Big burly men? Who needs em. I've got my own muscles that I work hard for, right? However, this weekend especially, God has kinda made it really clear that I'm really not independent at all.
I just finished reading The Screwtape Letters by C.S. Lewis - MIND. BLOWN. I strongly recommend it. If you haven't read it, here's a brief summary: the book is a series of letters from a senior demon, Uncle Screwtape, to his nephew, Wormwood, a demon-in-training. The letters are a form a guidance to the junior demon to draw a man to the father (Satan) and away from the Enemy (God). These letters show a side of Satan that we sometimes forget to see; a Satan that attacks us in ways of comfort.
"It does not matter how small the sins are provided that their cumulative effect is to edge the man away from the Light and out into the Nothing. Murder is no better than cards if cards can do the trick. Indeed the safest road to Hell is the gradual one--the gentle slope, soft underfoot, without sudden turnings, without milestones, without signposts." -C.S. Lewis
WOAH. If you think about it, Satan doesn't attack us in big ways. He uses small instances to draw us away from the Lord. This rings so true in my life right now. As I'm thinking "I've got this," and "I'm super duper independent," I am being drawn further and further away from being DEPENDENT on God. See where I'm going with this?
The second I quit relying on God, I am back to things that I thought I was over. Things I thought I had grown past. Lessons I thought I had already learned. But lemme be real with y'all...
--I WILL NEVER BE STRONG ENOUGH TO DO THIS LIFE THING ON MY OWN--
Should I type that again? Or did the all-caps, underline, and super pink, bold font get the picture across? This is huge, guys! I'm not saying I will be perfect if I'm always dependent on the Lord. That's impossible. I'm a human being made entirely of earthly stinkin flesh. But I am saying that it is much harder for Satan to attack me when I've consciously decided that I can't do it without Him, my Savior and King. Does it take my pride away? Absolutely. Is it a tough lesson to learn? Absolutely. But it's something that God has slapped in my face this weekend and I refuse to ignore it and remain complacent in the comforts of this world (although, that would be way easier).
being dependent on God > being an I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T woman
"As the deer pants for the water, so my soul pants for you, God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God." Psalm 42: 1-2
Stay thirsty, my friends.
In Him,
Katie
So just saw the link on fbook and started reading a little and no joke, reading this may or may not have brought some tears. Love reading testimonies like this, SO powerful and SO awesome, I loved it and was much encouraged and moved. God is so faithful and good, and it's awesome to have read and seen Him blossom and display Himself so much in your own life in the short time I've gotten to know you. I'm so glad for our fairly new friendship and look forward to it hopefully growing :D
ReplyDeletePsalm 86:10-15 came to mind when reading this, "great is thy faithfulness"
Lay it out there Katie....blessings
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